The Tea Cake

The tea cake is the one UK sweet that I remain powerless in the presence of.

Take a cookie, place a gooey marshmallow on top, and then cover the lot in either milk or dark chocolate, and you have a teacake. My favorites (above) are made by Tunnock's, a Scottish company.

They're a bit like the American Mallomar, which is only made seasonally due to its low melting temperature.

Thing is, the Mallowmar's marshmallow is very firm and feels somewhat fake, whereas the Tunnock's marshmallow Fluff- like filling tastes much less synthetic. The addition of English chocolate, which is much less waxy than that in the US, puts the Tunnock's version in a league of its own.

Walker's Cajun Squirrel Crisps

Just when I start thinking that maybe I've run out of supermarket amusements, another one presents itself.

We were wandering though a BP station when we stumbled across these Walker's Cajun Squirrel flavored crisps (American: Chips). Having no self- preservation instinct, I insisted that we buy them immediately and investigate.

Upon closer inspection of the bag, we determined that the squirrel chips contain not squirrel, but "Squirrel Seasoning", whatever that is. I gather it's the rodent- equivalent of Cheez. The chips are also suitable for vegetarians, which was a bit of a disappointment.




Moving on, it was time for the eating of the Squirrel Chips.
They look pretty ordinary, not like they're packed full of squirrel-y seasoning.


And how were they?

They're pretty good. I'm not sure if that's squirrel favor we were savoring, but whatever it was, we liked it.
Here's my bro digging into them before catching his flight home:


Walker's currently has a contest on for a new crisp flavor, among the contenders is this Cajun Squirrel, Fish & Chips, Chili & Chocolate, and a few others. One can read up and vote here.

More Fun with Food: Stagg Chili

Even before we moved to London, my husband made many a reference to Stagg Chili. He still does.

Most of the time, these mentions have come when I am out of town, and he is regaling me with tales of his home alone status and accompanying chili-laden man diet.

I've lived in England for over a year now, but even back in New York, I had always assumed that the, "Stagg" in Stagg Chili was actually, "Stag", and that this was all just a funny reference to some form of bachelor chow. This assumption was further supported by the fact that bachelor party is termed a, "Stag Do" here.


Today, I came home from work, went in the kitchen, and discovered that Stagg/Stag Chili IS real.

I was shocked. There it was on the counter, full of promise, offering an, "Authentic American" recipe, and, "shaped minced beef".

I don't know why minced beef would need shaping. It makes me a bit nervous. Still and so, the back of the can claims a legendary taste experience awaits me inside of this can.

Unfortunately, I'm unable to report on how the chili actually tastes. It was made quite clear that it is not for me and that there will be no sharing.

Next Houseguest gets a Dalek Cake

That's right. Next houseguest means a Dalek-shaped cake will be consumed at our house.

It may not be your birthday according to your driver's license, but it will be here in Southwest London. I can't promise that there won't be hats, candles, and a pinata; however, I'll try to keep it reasonable for your sake.

I spotted this at the M&S right after my birthday. Now we need a good reason to eat it, and, "Wednesday" simply won't do.

The next birthday in our apartment is the cat's, and that's not until the end of March. That's is just entirely too long for us to wait to have this cake in our living room. Besides, the kitty doesn't like cake!

I recognize that you could go somewhere warm and sunny, but why would you want to do that when you could come to England in late winter? I can offer you drizzle, overcast skies, and a balmy 13 C. We'll even throw in an umbrella to shield you from the elements.

The Flapjack

This morning, I embarked on a mission to brave the flapjack.

It has been there all along at the snackbar on the floor of my office , but I've held back, as while it looks like it could be a delicious cookie, it could also go horribly wrong.

It started out well. The flapjack is a lot like a very dense and buttery oatmeal cookie that has been made in the style of dessert bars, which are sliced inside the pan.

I had planned to take a picture of the flapjack outside of its packaging, but I was too enthralled while eating it to stop and take a picture. I also realized that someone might pop in and catch me trying to take a reasonable picture of a bisected flapjack and have yet another reason to think I'm a bit odd.

Then it all went wrong.

I finished the flapjack and cast the wrapper to the corner of my desk, where I'm saving garbage to build a nest for the apocalypse. Shortly after, my eyes wandered over to the wrapper while on a call, and I flipped the wrapper over to check out the nutritional information...

Expiration: 23 November 2008 (Apologies, the picture from my Blackberry is a bit blurry.)

What to do?

I felt OK... but, then again, my husband does proudly tell strangers that I could (and would, probably) eat a bowl of change.

Should I tell the canteen that they're selling expired food?
-Yes: It's the right thing to do.
-No: I could allow other people the choice to have a possible sick day due to the snack bar's silent threat. I might steal another's opportunity for joy, to be had only by making one's new graduates eat a snack with a not lengthy enough shelf life.

Then I forgot about it; something shiny got my attention, or possibly it was just work. I took the secret home with me, seemingly unscarred by my snack.

Now, I have concerns that my consumption of this expired flapjack may have affected my experience, requiring me to repeat the experiment and eat another; only this time, a fresh one.

More to follow.

Christmas Pudding

Christmas Pudding is the traditional English dessert on Christmas day.

Christmas Pudding may be made months in advance; thus, it's heavy and so boozy that it tastes a bit flammable.

To futher assert one's pudding prowess, one may douse the pudding in brandy and serve it flambe. This year, we opted for a brandy cream sauce.